WWSUD?

What Would Steve Urkel Do...to combat depression?



Obviously, a silly polka dance followed by a pratfall. DUH.

Oh, sorry Mario. You accidentally transformed into that. #1

Mario games are great, we can all agree on that. But within each game, there have been a few missteps here and there.



There's really only two things I hate about Super Mario Galaxy. Swimming without a shell is annoying I find. But even worse is Spring Mario, in which Mario becomes a barely controllable spring that is constantly bouncing. Throw in conveyor belts in levels in which you have to be Spring Mario, and you have a recipe for frustration. I'm pretty sure I skipped all of those levels for the sake of maintaining a normal level of blood pressure.

Terrible Moments in Spiderman History #1

I stopped reading comics a long time ago, but every so often I'll be bored at work and attempt to catch up and see what's going on with my favorite childhood characters. Every little detail I've uncovered since then makes me say "yiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes", because comics are terrible terrible things. In my research, I've read some truly awful comics from the past twenty years. I'm pretty sure Spiderman has fared the worst of all, and possibly hasn't been in a good story over that time span (20 years!).

This was his personality for awhile:



"I am the spider". Oof. An angry deranged Spiderman. Perfect, exactly what people want to read. Here's another one:



I hope the people responsible for the above woke up one morning and asked for forgiveness for actually writing that. This too:



Pound this storyline down, and stamp it out of the history books. It gets worse from here. Much worse.

Song Lyric Battle #1

Which is worse:

"Girl, shake dat laffy taffy, dat laffy taffy. Shake dat laffy taffy, dat laffy taffy" -"Shake Dat Laffy Taffy", D4L (but you probably only heard it sampled by Girl Talk)

or

"Are we human? Or are we dancer?" -"Human", The Killers (who are not, nor ever shall be, better than Radiohead despite Brandon Flowers' claims)

I'm not a member of the Grammar Gestapo and realize that sometimes songs sound better when you throw out the rules, but the lack of an s at the end of "dancer" bugs me. Brandon Flowers also kind of bugs me on a personal level. A quick trip to Urban Dictionary reveals that "laffy taffy" is an...err...interesting metaphor.

The Many Faces of Chuck Bass #1

Smoldering Intensity

Zubaz

Over the years, I've heard a lot of hate for the 1980's as a decade. Obviously, every decade has its flaws. I think that's something we can all agree on. However, I am about to deliver some damning evidence that the 1990's should forever be considered The Overall Worst Decade. To whit:



Zubaz. Each pair of pants has a distinct zebra pattern. It could be your standard zebra as seen above, or red/black, or...well, just take a look over at the Zubaz Shop because they are still being made. Just in time for Father's Day!

According to the always reliable Wikipedia, Zubaz, whose company motto is "Dare To Be Different" (no shit), sold $100 million worth of merchandise in 1991 alone. All jokes aside, that's pretty impressive. I'm not going to say that my younger self had two pairs of these (red/black and green/black), but I'm not going to NOT say it either.

Intro

Let's take a trip down memory lane in some of the insane things that pop culture has provided us in our youths, as well as some of today's insanity (and there is PLENTY of it to go around). What spurred this on? Mostly being forced to go through my old comic collection to see what can be gotten rid of, and subsequent re-readings of said comics. That and my unending fascination with the 70's and early 80's. I'll do my best to avoid the easy targets, but no guarantees. Above all things, remember - everything is weird.